The passage of scripture the pastor used was from 1 Cor. 7:4-6:
4 The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5 Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 6 But I say this as a concession, not as a commandment. (NKJ)
The word “defraud” is used in other translations in place of the word “deprive”. It was the use of the word “defraud” that caught my attention. To defraud someone is to cheat them. Here’s what I find interesting. When people use the word “cheat” in reference to marriage, in most cases, it is synonymous with infidelity. (“He/she cheated on me…”) I’ve never heard it used in reference to withholding sex. But that’s exactly how that passage was illuminated to me.
WARNING: Here comes my soap box…this could get ugly. Proceed with caution.
Here’s what I don’t get…wives that withhold sex from their husbands for reasons other than medical/physical disabilities. What-the-heck! That’s like THE main reason people get married. (And don’t tell me you got married for companionship…you could have had that BEFORE you got married.) Granted, people – many of them – have sex before they get married, but I’m talking about people who claim Jesus as their Lord. That should be a different story. God wants married couples to have sex…as much as you (and/or your spouse) want. It was HIS idea. Woman, you are cheating your husband by withholding what is rightfully his. (Same goes for the husband, but I think that may be more rare.)
(Climbing down from soap box…)
Obviously, there is more to a good and healthy marriage than sex. But, don’t kid yourself into thinking that it’s way down on the list.
If you would like to watch the marriage series, you can view it at this site: http://www.churchonthemove.com/service
Preach it Sister! There are not enough Christian women talking about how important this topic is. I think a lot of problems would be solved by more intimacy/sex than people think. It is really difficult to stay mad at someone when you have a great (and frequent) sex life.
ReplyDeleteI can't imagine why either! I remember reading this verse before really early on in marriage and thinking wow, I have to make sure I never do that! Although I might not always stack up on some other stuff at least I have one thing down. And it only took 6yrs, I am a fast learner.
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